Dear Crockpot,

So far, you have not impressed me. In fact, every time I use you (which, I guess, has only been twice... but still), the delicious food I'm attempting to cook burns. The first time around when I made that nummy barbecue chicken, it was fine because just the sauce around the chicken burned -- so it still tasted great, and although the sauce went from red to black during to crock-potting process, it did not stick to the side and require a large amount of effort to clean. However, tonight's happening is nearly unforgivable. Don't expect to be taken out again for awhile... a long while.

You see, I found this recipe for barbecue ribs yesterday. It asked that I first put the ribs in the oven for an hour, and then transfer them to you for ten hours of slow-cooking, promising moist, tender, fall-off-the-bone, mouthwatering ribs (unlike the ones I ate last weekend... yuck!). So I mixed up the barbecue marinade last night so I wouldn't have to do it this morning, and set the alarm for 6:20 a.m. Yes, indeed, 6:20 a.m. That is an hour and a half earlier than I needed to get up for work today. But, I did it, because the ribs needed to be baked before meeting you for ten hours. And then the alarm was set again, for 7:20 a.m, 25 minutes before I needed to get up for work, in order to have the ribs hang out with you, their buddy, for the next ten hours.

And when my hubby texted me today at noon, letting me know how wonderful the house smelled, I so strongly believed that this time around, you would not burn me [literally]. Oh, how wrong I was.

I won't lie, I wasn't exactly surprised when I arrived home after my Body Blast exercise class to see that the sauce surrounding the ribs was black, like the time I made barbecued chicken. However, I was very dissatisfied when I realized that the black sauce was no longer sauce. Instead, you delivered a solid, caked on, dried out, charred black mess. And although the ribs were fall of the bone, some of the meat had fallen off and practically been eaten by the charred sauce. That's right -- some of the meat was stuck in it. And the meat that was able to extracted from the mess was, for the most part, dry. And the barbecue marinade I had mixed up? Terrible. Or, at least, it was terrible now that it had been burned onto the meat. Yuck.

My hubby was kind enough to eat some of it, but certainly not a large enough portion to make it through work tonight. So we also added a microwaved burrito from the frozen food aisle to his supper. I indulged in homemade macandcheese... which, I assure you, I do not mind. Except when I've been dreaming of perfectly crock-potted ribs all day.

And as if the crappy food wasn't bad enough, I had to clean you. Not to mention, figure out how to get the two inches of charred sauce stuck to you, off.

So you see, I can handle having a recipe not work out. What I'm not so keen on is the amount of time and elbow grease I needed to clean you. In fact, I spent 30 minutes trying to get the black stains off of your pretty red interior. I even let you soak in hot, soapy water for 15 minutes between cleaning efforts. And you still have some remnants left on you. But you know what? I don't care.

Yes, pretty red Crockpot -- I am indeed punishing you. You will remain a teensy bit dirty and in the cupboard for at least two months.

Unless I find another nummy recipe to try that calls for you.