What's the Medora Musical all about?

In my classroom we do sharing every morning. At the beginning of the week, the kids are put on a "Sharing Schedule" and four or five students are assigned one day to share that week. They can bring something in to share, just tell about something, or, if they like, pass on their day.

Today the sweetest little peanut shared that over the summer, her family took a vacation for her little sister's birthday. They traveled to Mt. Rushmore (by the way: if you ever want to impress a third grader from North Dakota, tell them you've been to Mt. Rushmore. This location never ceases to amaze them and they are beyond fascinated by it. It may even rival Disney World -- true story) and then continued on the Medora to be a part of the world's cheesiest all-American propoganda: the Medora Musical.

Now, if you've never been, Medora is a town way out in the middle of nowhere western North Dakota. It really is a beautiful setting with the North Dakota badlands all around. But what occurs there is beyond fathomable: a robotic Theodore Roosevelt, a female main character that rides around on a pink semi-truck while a chorus of twelve or so twenty-somethings sing and dance around in full-out cowboy and cowgirl gear with crazy happy smiles across their faces. Think "High School Musical" only elevated five levels in cheese factor with lots of American flags and cowboy influence. It's awesome. Not to mention you can eat steak that's been cooked in a GIANT vat of oil while skewered on a pitchfork. Mmmhmm, you heard me. They call it pitchfork fondue. Again, awesome. Anyway.

So anyway, since some kids have never been to the Medora Musical, I ask her to share with the class what it's all about.

And with a beautiful, big smile and gleaming eyes, she shares proudly, "It's all about Teddy Bear Roosevelt."

So cute. So sweet. So much work to do in third grade.

I love school.

:)

The Internet! Or... lack thereof

Usually you can blame my horrible irregular blogging tendancies on my own neglect... but as of late, you can blame it on one thing: the INTERNET. Because, you see, hubby and I have been living life sans internet for almost an entire week.

Yes, my friends. It's true. Surprisingly, I have not spontaneously combusted due to my life's lack of Facebooking (though I have had a few mental breakdowns over not having access to my favorite blogs and Pinterest...).

See, hubby and I like to put as much money aside for my clothes from the Gap our future home as possible from my salary each month and we've adopted the "envelope system" otherwise and spend no more than $100.00 per week, not including the cost of gas. Of course, there are other monthly costs that are non-negotiable as well: electricity, cell phone, one pack of beer for the hubby, gym membership for me... And up until last October, we lived on our college campus apartments, which meant we had free utilities, cable AND internet.

And we moved out. What were we thinking!?

Well, probably that the 500 square foot closet we were living in just wasn't going to cut it for the next couple years of marriage. But besides that.

But lucky us, when we moved in last October, some silly amazing person didn't secure their wireless internet. Whooo for free wi-fi! Of course, we knew the day would come when they wised up and secured it so little scavengers like us couldn't piggyback anymore... and that day came last May and was followed by a chorus of sobs from hubby and I. Luckily, we were moving to our hometown for the summer and didn't need the internet in our apartment during that time. So we crossed our fingers and hoped someone new would move in and give us that wonderful little gift yet again this year.

Alas, no such luck. So now we face the life altering decision to pay 30 bucks a month for internet access or not. How will we choose? Save $360.00 a year... or live without Pinterest, Facebook and the blogosphere while not at work? AH!

Initially, I wasn't sure how we'd cope without our constantly plugged in addiction. The thought of not being able to see if so-and-so broke up with so-and-so, or seeing the latest pictures of my former roommate's cousin's best friend's step-sister killed me. HOW did we survive ten years ago when we didn't have this brain draining service constantly at our fingertips? How could life go on?

But it did. And it has. Maybe for the better.

Hubby and I talk more, and possibly even better, laugh more. We sit on our deck and read. He helped me cook the other night. We take walks, go for drives, enjoy these last beautiful summer evenings... And because of this, part of me thinks that maybe we shouldn't get back online in our apartment.

Unfortunately, there's too many things that are inconvenient to not have the internet. Hubby can't hop on Blackboard for his college courses in the evenings to do his homework. More minor? There's no checking the weather or getting news updates. Or seeing what my favorite style bloggers wore Wednesday (WIWW? Anyone? Love it. Maybe I need to start that here, since I'm sure you're ALL wondering what I wore Wednesday!)

So I guess we're kissing our $360 good-bye this year and we're signing ourselves up for the zombie-ensuing service that is the internet.

But hopefully this time we'll rememeber how nice it was to come home and have someone to talk to. And we'll make the choice to quit pinning, stalking facebooking and shopping -- and, instead, start living.

So Long, Sweet Summer

For the kiddos and teachers in my district, school begins one week from today. Eek! Where in the world did the summer go?

Though much of my summer was spent watching What Not to Wear twice a day, running through the grass barefoot and eating lunch at 2:00 in the afternoon, I did do a few things...

Hubby and I traveled south to Orlando, Florida for a visit to the Disney World parks and (our fave!) The Wizarding World of Harry Potter... awesome! It was a delayed honeymoon I suppose, and we had a fantastic time. Woot!

My baby sister graduated from high school and will be heading to our city on Sunday for college... yay!

I completely re-did a fancy shmancy chair I bought at the Boy's Ranch last fall for $18.00.



Baked a sweet awesome sweet fourth of July American flag cake!

Spent days with my niece and nephews, hung out with my mom and sister, went for bike rides, traveled to Duluth and husband's cabin, spent time with my parents, did some gardening, caught up with cousins, ate loads of Dairy Queen, became addicted to Pinterest...

We move back to our apartment after spending the summer at my parent's home on Saturday. It'll be a sad day, but I've got a group of 23 kiddos waiting for me to fill their little minds with oodles of third grade knowledge!

So here's to a great summer and looking forward to what might lie ahead... and to staying positive, hopeful and thankful -- even when it might get tough.

Well... shoot, huh?

Those were the words my doctor used when she walked into the exam room and plopped down on her chair yesterday. Only she didn't say "shoot"... if you catch my drift.

And in those three words, she identified my feelings perfectly.

I was in to see if some magic medicine they gave me a few weeks prior did what it was supposed to. Obviously, it didn't.

Trying to figure out this whole "how do we let Megan be a mommy?" thing is exhausting. And frustrating. And depressing. And infuriating. One might think I actually was pregnant with the way I cycle through all of these emotions (and more!) over the course of probably five minutes.

My husband keeps telling me it will work -- something will work. My doctors keep saying that I will be a mommy. But it's so hard not to get dragged down by all of it. Husband can't see why I'm not more optimistic about it all, but it's this perpetual gnawing fear that eats at me that I just might be one of those women who can't have a baby.

It's hard to not be angry and to not have questions. What's wrong with me? Why am I "broken"? Why is this so easy for other women? Why do others who don't even want a baby get pregnant, while someone who does, can't? What if I really can't?

Last week my aunt, cousins, mom, sister and I went to the Minnesota Zoo. Our first stop there was the dolphin training show. The dolphins jumped high out of the water and the trainers threw them little fish as rewards... and all around me sat mommies and daddies with their little ones, oohing and aahing at each trick. And I sat with tears in my eyes, wondering if I would ever have a little one to take.

There are times when I have hope. But there are times when I just want to curl up and cry. And so I do. I'm trying to be mindful of a number of things: that God has a plan, that I've been blessed with a great husband, supportive and loving family, a job and friends that I love. And that, with time, there will be some form of a resolution.

Summer's almost over. My parents both took the day off and we, along with my sister, ate a yummy lunch on the patio while the sun warmed my skin and the wind blew through the cottonwoods and made that same soothing, comforting sound I know so well. It's days like these with people like that that I am hanging on to and keeping in my pocket for the ones ahead when I'm feeling defeated and like there's not much hope. Because remembering them makes me thankful for what I have when I'm being bratty and dramatic about what I don't.

So for the time being, I try to comfort myself. I try to stay positive and shut out those nasty, negative thoughts for at least bits and pieces of the day.

Yes, I will be a mommy. Just not yet.