Forty Nine Weeks!

Weight: I'm guessing around 18 pounds.

Sleep: Sleep is really good lately, usually giving us full, through-the-night, sleeps.

Medical Issues: Feeling good :)

Clothes: Starting to put away most of Lizzie's three to six month clothing and taking out all of the nine month/six to 12 month clothing.  She's still wearing her three to six month jammies, though :)

Socialite!: Lizzie got to spend some time with more cousins over the weekend! Rachel and Michael, who happens to be just a few weeks younger than Lizzie, came to visit. Lizzie and Michael don't do a lot of interacting together, but they do a lot of "parallel play" (tapping into my CDFS degree for that term ;)).

Diet: I continue to be amazed at our fabulous eater! We had fajitas earlier in the week, and girlfriend gobbled up everything -- including the red and yellow peppers and the onions! It was awesome.

In terms of milk, Lizzie has been a tank lately -- eating eight ounce bottles at night before bed and also first thing in the morning. Typically, she's a four-ounce per feeding baby. Growth spurt maybe?

She's also been increasingly interested in drinking the same milk I am lately. She seems to like it, which is good since we'll be transitioning to cow's milk in just a couple of weeks. We've been working on drinking out of a straw for a few weeks now, and girlfriend has finally seemed to grasp that concept :) 

Baby Gear Love: Still loving "pets" that she can hold in her hand -- that little "baby" rubber duck, her little stuffed octopus and little stuffed giraffe. 

Still loving books. She cries when we put them back on the shelf at bedtime!

Crying: Lizzie is such a happy babe. She only cries when she's hungry or tired.

Mommy News: Not much on the Mommy front after the "excitement" (not fun excitement, but excitement nonetheless). I did end up needing a D & C this week after my pregnancy,  but I feel fine and everything went "well" (as well as things can go when you have to go through the whole, miscarrying, thing). So at this point, just planning that first birthday party and appreciating every second with my little  miracle.

Milestones: Learned to drink out of a straw!

Given up on army crawling almost completely :)

Starting to stand on our own!

Cruising around EVERYTHING like it's her job! She's ready to get anywhere, whether it's by crawling or walking along the couch, ottoman, cabinets… :)

Forty Eight Weeks!

Weight: I'm guessing between 17 and 18 pounds.

Sleep: Sleep is pretty good. Waking up once a night lately due to an icky, croupy cough.

Medical Issues: Feeling good, aside from that croupy-sounding cough!

Clothes: Lizzie still fits nicely into her three to six month clothes, but I got bored with the same outfits all the time… I felt like I'd mixed and matched and mixed again all of her things, and I just couldn't take it anymore! So instead of buying more three to six month stuff,  I opted to start testing the waters with some of her 6 to 12 month stuff. Though they are a little bit, they fit well enough :) So she gets to wear all kinds of fun new stuff. Some of it is still too big to wear, but that's okay. Just more things to look forward to putting her in :)

For jammies, we're still sporting our three to six month sizes.

Socialite!: Lizzie got an extra day with Mommy last week on Good Friday since there was no school :) We spent a lot of time with Lizzie's cousins and with other family over the Easter weekend. Lizzie loves "big kids". She waves her arms and pumps her legs whenever they come around, and she's always wanting to be where the action is :) And they are so sweet to her, sharing toys and wanting to help me take care of her. She's a lucky girl! 

Diet: Lizzie seems to be turning into her mommy in a few food ways: first, she love love loves fruit! Second, she seems to have developed a distaste for sauces on her pasta. At one time, girlfriend would inhale pasta with red sauce and meat -- now, however, it's a different story. We can hardly get her to put it in her mouth, and once it does, it usually ends up coming out. However, she will eat some of it if it comes from one of our plates. So I'm trying a new strategy where I put her food on my plate and then give it to her. It seems to work 85% of the time :)

I've avoided peas for quite some time because they're small and can be messy, due to the fact that they roll everywhere if dropped on the floor. That hiatus is definitely done: earlier in the week, I made her enough peas for supper and for her lunch for daycare the next day. She grabbed the peas by the handful and dumped them into her mouth… loved them! She could pick them up one by one, but it seems she figured out that that was just too slow of a delivery :) Anyway, not only did she eat her peas for that night's supper, but she also ate all of her peas for her lunch the next day! They were like candy to her. It was awesome!

Baby Gear Love: Still loving books. She also loves her new flashcards that she got in her Easter basket. They are pretty awesome, and I'm not just saying that from a teacher standpoint :) They're touch and feel, which is perfect for her right now. She loves to look at them... and chew on them, too.

She also loves little "animals" that she can hold in her hand. At home, you'll find her consistently with two of the following (one in each hand) -- a little "baby" rubber duck, a little stuffed octopus or a little stuffed giraffe. She needs them -- all. The. Time!

We're also loving this Melissa and Doug Chunky Jungle Puzzle that we got in our Easter basket from Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Wayne. Lizzie takes the animals off, bangs them together, and (I swear this happens) roars when we look at the lion. It is hilarious and so darn cute. We weren't sure if we were hearing her correctly the first few times (skeptics), but she does it consistently, so it must be what she's doing! I always "raaar" when I point to the lion, so it does make sense.

Crying: Lizzie is such a happy babe. She only cries when she's hungry or tired.

Mommy News: First and foremost, I want to say that I was truly touched by the kind words and support I received after last week's sad news. Thank you to all who offered encouragement, and those who didn't, but to anyone who thought of and prayed for us. 

That being said, life ticks on. It's been a struggle, still. And I don't think it ever really stops being one. I still had days when I would cry from mourning the loss of the baby we lost before Lizzie was born. So I know that the pain never really goes away -- but that's okay, I suppose. Like I said last time -- it hurts because it mattered. Although those two babies won't be with us here on Earth, they are still our sons, daughters, brothers, sisters. We are still a family of five -- just not to the naked eye.

Over the weekend, though, I got in some really good days that were very "healing" for me (cheesy!). We got to spend time outside in the sunshine, got to laugh, got to spend lots of solid, good, uninterrupted time with Lizzie -- and I needed that. On Saturday afternoon, we spent a lot of time pushing Lizzie in a swing for the first time. She loved it, and my heart needed it. I went to bed that night feeling more whole than I have since we learned we were losing our baby. I am so thankful for my sweet girl that I can't even fathom it.

As much as I hate to say it, each day does get easier. The pain lessens a little more, I look forward to the future and what might come next, and I remind myself to stay in the present and enjoy Lizzie just as she is, just her, for now -- because this time with just one baby, just my one miracle baby, won't last forever. We will have more kids... and this precious time with just her will just be a memory.

Milestones: As mentioned previously, Lizzie is saying "raaar" -- is that a first word? I don't think so -- more of a first sound that has some meaning I think :)

Most exciting of all: Lizzie is now crawling on her hands and knees! No more army crawls for this girl! Well, maybe she hasn't given up the army crawling completely, but it's certainly lessened :)

Girlfriend's first Easter over the weekend as well... can't believe she's almost one year old!

Forty Seven Weeks!

Weight: I'm guessing between 17 and 18 pounds.

Sleep: Sleep is improving this week -- we're now getting our full nights again :) Yahoo!

Medical Issues: Feeling good :) Although I think she's got a cold coming on and might be teething a bit. We've got some odd diapers and, at times, a refusal to eat for no apparent reason… and I think there's a little bump on the top left side of her gums. We still have ZERO teeth, so it wouldn't surprise me.

Clothes: We're in three to six month clothes and three to six month jammies! 

Socialite!: Hanging out with daycare friends!

Diet: Loves everything, especially sweet potatoes, pineapple and kiwi. It seems that the more flavor something has, the more she loves it. I made turkey burgers last night with onions and green onions mixed in, and she DEVOURED it. Love to see my baby girl being such a good eater! So proud! Sometimes I think she'd just keep eating if I didn't limit her, though :) I guess my cooking is just that delicious ;)

It seems she thinks the food off my plate would taste better than that on her tray, even though they tend to be the exact same thing, so I do tend to find myself sharing part of my meal with her some nights ;)

Baby Gear Love: Books, books books! She loves them. She'll go pick some out and choose favorites of those to read over and over and over again. It's adorable. She's starting to really react to the books, too -- she'll laugh and squeal at certain parts/pictures of the books :) And over the weekend, she couldn't get enough of some little stuffed octopus with big, pretty eyes that my niece and nephews have. She didn't really play with it necessarily, but she just had to hold onto it.

Crying: Lizzie is such a happy babe. She only cries when she's hungry or tired.

Mommy News: (Note: I don't mention any of this for pity or attention. As always, these posts are written for me and for Lizzie, to remember these days. If you don't like it, skip it.)

It's been a very difficult few days for this momma. The day after I turned 27, we learned I was expecting a new baby brother or sister for Lizzie! We were over-the-moon excited! And I honestly believed with my whole heart that everything would be perfect and before Christmastime, we'd be a family of FOUR! I had no reason to think otherwise -- I've miscarried once before Lizzie, but had RPL testing done and everything came back perfectly, so I had no reason to suspect things wouldn't go as well as they did for my pregnancy with Lizzie. Unfortunately, we learned over the weekend that this sweet baby that we already came to love so much, would not join us here on Earth in our family.

So we mourn. And we grieve. And it's been hard. Like, really hard. And I find myself wondering, "how did I get through it the first time?" because I'm completely devastated and broken.

Lizzie is such a ray of sunshine and such a little miracle for us and I am so grateful to have her -- I don't know how I'd be getting up each day if it weren't for her right now. On Saturday after we found out, I was lying on our bed, crying, and Andy brought Lizzie in. She smiled, laid down next to me, then sat up and gave me a kiss. It was the sweetest thing ever. 

She would have been such a wonderful big sister to that baby. But she still will be. Just not before Christmastime.

I know how blessed we are, truly, to have Lizzie. Still, this loss just aches -- and I wish it would stop. But, as I remember from last time, it doesn't. And it won't. And that's just how pregnancy loss goes, sadly. I saw a quote recently that said something like, "It hurts because it mattered." I think that made me feel better, helped me to recognize why I hurt so much from it. Because it mattered. Because my baby, Lizzie's sibling, mattered.

Milestones: We are chatting up a storm! It's like she's learned a hundred new sounds this week. We're hearing a lot of the "n" sound lately, which is new, and she's become extremely fond of the "d" sound.

We've also become more and more talented at standing unassisted -- not that she's doing it all that often, but when we can slip one of our hands away from her, she can sometimes stand for five or ten seconds if she doesn't realize it.

Forty Six Weeks Old!

Weight: I'm guessing she's still around 17 pounds.

Sleep: Still struggling in this arena. We did have two nights in a row of through-the-night sleep, but other than that, girlfriend is waking at least two, maybe three, times each night. Oftentimes, she's hungry -- but sometimes, she's just awake. Suggestions? We've wondered if she's teething, but we can't feel or see any little teeth coming through...

Medical Issues: Feeling good :)

Clothes: We're in three to six month clothes and three to six month jammies! 

Socialite!: Hanging out with daycare friends!

Diet: Loves blackberries, sweet potatoes, pizza and these little pea crisps that I buy at Trader Joe's. She's an amazing eater and now prefers to "choose" her food off of a plate rather than having me just give it to her. She's also ALWAYS more interested in what we're eating than what she's eating -- even when it's exactly the same thing, just not cut up into smaller pieces for her.

Baby Gear Love: We've been loving books and our Fischer Price Laugh and Learn Cookie Shape Surprise!

Crying: Lizzie is such a happy babe. She only cries when she's hungry or tired.

Mommy News: First birthday party planning is in full swing! I've been getting my craft on and making some things for her party. So excited! I've found that I'm not a momma who is sad about her changing and growing. Instead, I find myself being so proud and so happy and so excited to see what comes next. Maybe with my next baby, I'll be more sad when they change and grow so fast, but not with Lizzie! I love watching her grow and change and experience new things.

Milestones: Girlfriend has gone from army crawling to spending some time up on those hands and knees, but not moving quite yet… I'm guessing it'll be soon! She's also become a much more confident cruiser along furniture.

Lizzie has also learned how to sit up on her own… hooray! Along with that, of course, comes the necessity to lower her crib. We peeked into her room on Saturday morning, and girlfriend was standing in her crib! What?! We didn't realize that was possible, because, well, it hadn't been until that day when she decided she knew how to sit up on her own, and could therefore grab the crib and stand up on her own. So her crib got lowered so we don't have to worry about her tumbling out :) She's also become much more comfortable and confident with holding just one of our hands while walking.

Forty Five Weeks Old!

Weight: Right around 17 pounds at the moment.

Sleep: Sleep still continues to be a sticking point for Lizzie since she had her nasty illness a few weeks ago. She's lost her beautiful sleeping-through-the-night habits and has traded them in for waking at least once, sometimes twice or three times each night -- and it's not a quick, pacifier in, type of up, either; oh no, it's a full-blown, rock me back to sleep thing. But to be fair, I think we're having a pretty big growth spurt right now, because she's been doing her "hungry cry" when she wakes in the middle of the night, which we haven't heard in quite a long time, really. Here's to hoping it ends soon and we can go back to sleeping eight hours straight :)

Medical Issues: We are now feeling great! Hooray!

Clothes: We're in three to six month clothes and three to six month jammies!
Socialite!: Hanging out with daycare friends, seeing Auntie Jenny who was home visiting from college, Auntie Desiree, Uncle Jake, and cousins Mykenna, Noah and Brayden for a short time over the weekend, and hanging out with Great Grandma and Grandpa, a couple of second cousins and a Great Aunt and Uncle (whew!) over the weekend :) Girlfriend joined a group of girls on my side of the family on Saturday for a day of shopping, eating and painting (we did the Paint Pub thing… SO fun!) and was amazing all day long. She's a great shopper and is always so content. We're so lucky to have such a sweet baby!

Diet: Lizzie is in love with pineapple, bananas and sweet potatoes lately. We have to be careful not to let her see bananas especially, even if they're just sitting on the counter or at the grocery story -- she's an animal! She seems to be a big fan of cheese lately, and certainly can't get enough pizza. I'm always cautious on giving her too much of each of those, just because of sodium content -- regardless, she eats ANYTHING and everything we put in front of her basically. Last night, she ate half of a four ounce pork chop (cut up, of course :)), quite a few sweet potatoes and green beans, red cherries, raspberries, pineapple and blackberries. She is a TANK.

As I said previously, I think we've got a growth spurt going on. Girlfriend is eating like it's her job, both table food and milk. She's been guzzling eight ounce bottles pretty frequently, and even took 12 (!) ounces before bed one night and proceeded to wake up in the middle of the night to eat again. Wowza.

Baby Gear Love: Loves anything that makes a good "rattling" sound :) She's also a big fan of her B. One Two Squeeze Blocks. She'll come to destroy any tower we make and gladly lay claim to a few blocks and chew on them :)

Crying: Lizzie is such a happy babe. She only cries when she's hungry or tired.

Mommy News: Only seven or so Mondays left before we're on summer break and girlfriend and I can hang out all day, every day! Love it. I'm in the process of planning her birthday party as well, making lots of decorations and Pinterest inspired things :)

I also celebrated my first birthday with Lizzie out of my tummy today :) Andy asked what my best birthday so far has been -- he was wondering if it was this year, since she's finally here :)

Milestones: BIG news! We have a mover on our hands. Girlfriend finally opted to start army crawling out of nowhere. She's still not the happiest of campers about doing so, but she's starting to realize that she can get things she wants if she'll do it. I think that once she realizes the "power" she has now that she can crawl, we'll be in for some trouble… :) She did make the connection the other day that to get closer to me, she could crawl to a chair, pull herself up on it, cruise along it and then walk to the end table next to it, so that was pretty awesome.

I also swear she says "all done" -- I've heard it a few times at exactly the right moments. Of course, when I try to prompt her to say it, she won't, but she's definitely done it when she's finished eating a few times.

We're still loving books, with a select few as her favorites. She loves Llama, Llama books, books with flaps and books with babies in them (it's adorable -- she smiles at them and jabbers at them when she looks through the books).