Guess who's back?

Shame on me! What a horrible blogger I've been. Sorry for the lack of posts for the last, oh, two months! I wouldn't be surprised if I lost some of my poor readers who got sick and tired of waiting for me to post again... serves me right. Life got busy and I got... lazy? Ah well, what matters is, I'm back.

I went back to my old high school tonight for my sister's band "pop concert". It's an awesome display of musical talent, not to mention delicious desserts to enjoy while you listen and the band plays popular music -- from the Beatles, to Journey, to the Lion King, it's all good. It was, however, stifling hot in that old gymnasium, due to the near-90 degree temperatures we've been lucky enough to enjoy lately : ) Anyway, it's interesting what some of those events can do for a person.

Five years ago, I sat in that gymnasium, walked across a stage and turned a tassel. Just a few weeks before that, I participated in my own "pop concert" as a trumpet player, alongside some of my best friends. And consistently across the three years before that, I attended pep band gigs religiously in that gymnasium, where I formed some of the best memories I have.

Now, I'm not just getting all nostalgic to get nostalgic. I don't really do that anymore over high school because I know how blessed I am and I wouldn't give up who I am, where I am, and how I've grown and changed over the past five years for anything. But I had this friend once. He was remarkable. So fun, so gifted, and so a part of so many of those memories.

He was loud. He gave me a handshake upon entering the band room every day. We laughed. A lot. He mooned us out of a moving car window on the way back from open lunch. We ate a lot of popcorn chicken from KFC during open lunch. We went to lunch together almost every day for awhile. He wore tight pants before it was 'cool' to wear tight pants (is it even 'cool' to wear tight pants? Not so much in my book). He loved to play his trombone. He always bummed me an ear bud from his first-generation iPod during band, and he'd lean real far forward from the trombone section so I could listen from the trumpet section, and the band teachers never said anything. They liked us; at least, I like to think they did. We always sat next to each other at pep band and raced down those rickety, wooden stars as fast as we could during the percussion break of "Land of 1000" so we could dance as wildly as we could. He'd sing the loudest on "Hey! Baby!"

And that's what sparked it tonight, really. As their closing tonight at the concert, Jefferson Senior High School's graduating senior class of 2010 chose their favorite pep band song to play. It was that song. And instead of thinking of all those times at Bison football games in college when NDSU's pep band played that song and my friends and I all sang along obnoxiously, I thought of him. Our arms outstretched, instruments in hand, hips wiggling to the tune, and voices loud. I can still hear him.

He's not here anymore. Hasn't been for awhile. I let go a long time ago, whatever that means. Really, that's kind of sad -- how can you let go of someone because they die? Seems kind of harsh. But we kind of have to.

It's weird. We were all so close when we walked those halls and played in that gym. And then we walked across that stage, turned our tassels, and never thought we wouldn't be friends. And it's not that we're not friends. We just aren't friends. We all ended up looking in new directions, and somewhere along the way, we turned into totally different people.

I guess that's what happens. And that's okay. It's just weird to think about -- how much has changed. Like I said, I don't get nostalgic over high school anymore -- so I guess I've never thought about how much changed.

I'm not sad. At least, not over the changed friendships. I'm just... temporarily nostalgic.

Sorry for the semi-depressing post.

Glad I'm back? : )